Tag: relationships

Mantra Mondays

Mantra Monday #4 (7/24/17)

liz

You are the only one who can limit your greatness.

I was having a conversation with my best friend the other day about this concept; that even though there are people in your life who are close friends to you that when it comes to further your success, you are the only one who can help you achieve that. Everyone else is worried about achieving their own success that people forget that you would want your people to succeed with you. At the end of the day, if you’re in a situation where your group of friends is practicing the “every man for himself” lifestyle, it’s only right to do so yourself. There’s no purpose in trying to help your friend out if they aren’t going to help you back, so why not begin to be there for yourself? Achieve your own success, follow your dreams at your own pace, do what it takes to satisfy your needs and wants to succeed. Only you know how you work, what you can handle, and most importantly: what you want.

-Liz (:

Self-Appreciation Saturdays

Self-Appreciation Saturday. (7/22/17)

liz

 

There will be toxic people at some point in your life. No matter where you go, you will encounter someone who is toxic to your well-being. These people are disguised as anyone: friends, brothers, sisters, mothers, fathers, relatives, boyfriends, girlfriends, husbands, wives; you name it. Sadly, we can’t avoid these people in our lives.

I was lucky enough to cut the people who were toxic in my life when the relationship between me and the toxic people were just friends. Toxic friends damage you, but when you have the strength to put yourself first, letting go of friends is easy; you stop talking to them. But there are situations where the toxic people live in your own home, or when you’re related to them, or when you’re married or in a relationship. These type of toxic people are a different type of toxic; you care for them and worry about them even when it hurts you and your well-being. Dysfunctionality in romantic and family relationships are sadly one of the man norms in our society, but not all are toxic. But when these relationships turn toxic and stay toxic for periods of time, it could really do damage on a person’s emotions and mentality.

The sad reality about being in this situation is that there aren’t that many options on the table when it comes to taking care of yourself. No matter what route you go down on, you have some potential loss. Whether you decide to do when dealing with toxic people that you can’t necessarily escape, make sure that you don’t make moves with an angry mindset. In other words, make sure what you’re doing is rational and beneficial; don’t do anything just to do anything.

  • If you’re dealing with a toxic person in the household, make sure to find a safe space. It’s not the easiest trying to escape from a household member while they’re under the same roof as you. If you’re finding it difficult to get away from the person while they’re being “toxic”, go to an area where you can close a door. Sometimes, that barrier of a door eases your mind a bit; knowing that person is on the other side of the door. If you still hear them being toxic and whatnot, put some headphones on and try to distract yourself. Finding your safe space to go to will help you not get too indulged in the toxic person’s activities and actions.
  • Stop making excuses for the toxic person. When someone around you is toxic to you, you begin to make excuses for their behavior; some that you would usually be appalled of if it were anyone else. Toxic people make you believe and think that they are the victim in the situation. “Oh, they’re going through a rough tie in their life.” “They aren’t thinking straight.” “They don’t know what they are talking about.” Simple excuses like that will make the toxic person have power over you and instead of trying to be there for them, you’re hurting yourself. The true reality is that if a person is being toxic and they don’t do anything to help stop the toxicity spreading in their surroundings, they most likely don’t care about how you feel or what they do to you. What more do you need to stop making excuses for their behavior?
  • It’s not your fault that that toxic person is toxic. Toxic people love to blame other people for their behavior and constantly say that other people are the reason why they are the way they are. You have to realize that no one is responsible for your own actions; you make the decisions for your own life. Toxic people don’t see it like that. It’s easy to get sucked in and ask yourself “why are they acting like this towards me? What did I do? You have to remember that people live their own lives and go through their own shit, and sometimes it’s easy for them to blame their actions on other people. It’s never a person’s fault when someone is toxic.
  • Love from afar. If you’re dealing with a toxic family relative or someone in that nature, it’s hard to stop caring or loving them because of their toxicity. Although that person may be family, toxic people are a downer and they affect your decisions and outlook on life. Sometimes, your only option is to love someone from a distance. Sometimes, you have to distance your emotions from someone for the sake of your own mentality and perspective on life. There’s nothing more to it.
  • Move forward with your life. When a toxic person is in your life, sometimes it could feel like you’re stuck in one spot without any guidance or direction out of it. When you don’t have that control over your life, you feel like you have no control of the other things in your life. When dealing with toxic people, your best bet is to just completely cut them out of your life. If you’re in a situation where you can’t cut a toxic person out of your life, following any of the points above will help you move forward with your life. Take care of yourself, be your own support group. DO things that make you happy and feel like you’re progressing forward.

No matter who it is, dealing with toxic people is possibly one of the hardest things to go to, especially if it’s family or close relatives. No matter what, your life matters and your happiness should always be your number one priority. Don’t sell yourself short and don’t treat the ones around you poorly; you know how it feels to be on the other end of that line.

 

-Liz (:

The Travel Diaries, Topic Tuesdays: Random

Travel Diary: Poughkeepsie, NY.

liz
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View of “Walking Across the Hudson”: Poughkeepsie, NY.

Friday, June 14th – The Departure

After spending most of the week preparing and getting nervous for going away with Obie for the first time, it was finally time to leave and start our 3-hour ride to Poughkeepsie. My bag felt like it was overpacked because, by the time I left, I felt the almost 20 pounds weighing on my shoulder. We met up halfway to Grand Central because – let’s face it – Grand Central Station is huge. When we finally met up though, I felt the butterflies in my stomach. This was my first getaway trip with Obie; and for an anxious person like myself, I’m always thinking the most impossible “what if” scenarios whenever I do something for the first time. Anyway, we got on the subway to Grand Central, and thankfully found the ticket booth. Obie and I looked up at the departure times and saw that The Hudson Line to Poughkeepsie was departing in 5 minutes. We looked at each other and booked it to Track 33; we made it just in time.

The actual Metro-North train ride there wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be. Obie was asleep for most of the ride, and I just listened to music while looking out at the view. It was cloudy on Friday, so when the train was near the Hudson River, it was foggy and cloudy and the water was calm and untouchable. I regret not taking a picture, but it really reminded me of the scenery of The Killing. Oddly, it was satisfying and beautiful to see. It was as beautiful as Obie described it.

By the time we got to Poughkeepsie, Obie and I walked over to the infamous store that he kept talking about when he went to Poughkeepsie previously. This corner store on the outside gave me some serious Pennsylvania vibes. Anyway, we got all the snacks that we needed for the night, all the drinks as well, and then we finally walked back to his niece’s apartment. When I tell you the apartment is possibly the most legit apartment ever… yeah. It’s a two-floor apartment with three bedrooms and two bathrooms, a nice little kitchen and dining area and living room. It was really such a chill place. She has two kids, so the kids have their own room, she and her boyfriend have the third one, so Obie and I slept in the living room on the couch. I don’t know we did it, but we did it. Friday we all just chilled and watched movies and rap battle and just macked.

Saturday, July 15th – The Sunburn and “Lituation”

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8:57am: A Sleepy Obielocks.

Obie and I woke up around 9 in the morning, and we just relaxed and ate before we all decided to go to the park down the road with the kids. Not realizing it was going to be like 90 degrees, your girl had on a vest and jeans on. On top of that, the park that we went to had absolutely no shade, so I ended up with a slight sunburn on my face and my arms. I don’t know how the guys played basketball for 2 hours in that heat, but they were playing 2 vs. 2 with some other ball players in the park. I can tell when Obie gets competitive on the court; he moves more carefully and gets pretty rowdy, but it was a good couple of games. During the time I was sitting there and burning my skin off, Obie’s 5-year-old nephew, Cam, gave me a cute tiny flower. He is such a little sweetheart.

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12:35pm: The tiny flower artsy picture.

 

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Basketball Court in the Park: Poughkeepsie, NY

After being in the park for the entire afternoon, Obie and I were the first to leave to head back to the infamous store (we went in there like 5 times in 3 days, to be honest), and go back to the apartment. We automatically took our well-needed showers because hello – he was sweaty from basketball and I was sweaty from baking out in the sun. 

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2:39pm: The best Obie pictures are the off-guard ones.

We both ate some lunch and immediately knocked out on the sofa together for a couple of hours… we’re that couple that sleeps most of our hours away together. Later that day, all four adults played Spades. Prior to this weekend, I’ve watched Obie play Spades with his friends back at his apartment and never played because I didn’t know how to play. So, Obie had to teach me and his niece’s boyfriend had to teach her. At first, I made some minor mistakes, but after playing a couple of games I was getting really good at it. I mean REALLY good. As #TeamCozy, we won most of the books in the game and now I’m slightly obsessed and want to play more. After that we all made dinner and everyone went upstairs while Obie and I chilled in the living room and watched some Netflix before quickly knocking out.

Sunday, July 16th – Relaxation & Going Home

Obie and I woke up around 10 o’clock in the morning and literally just relaxed until we couldn’t take the sounds of our grumbling stomachs. We both got dressed and went to the infamous store one last time to pick up a couple of goodies for our ride home later that night. Side note: Obie has been raving about these chips since this prior trip to Poughkeepsie and telling me how amazing they were. I finally got to try them and my god they are amazing. They are called “Rap Snacks”, specifically this flavor is his favorite. 

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The infamous Rap Snacks from Poughkeepsie.

After picking us up some Rap Snacks, we walked to the train station to get our tickets just so that we don’t have to rush when we finally decide to take off. We then got some pizza to take back to the apartment and from there we just chilled in the apartment until it was time to leave. Again, we took like a 5-hour nap that afternoon, and by the time we woke back up, it was time to get our things together to head back to the city. His niece took us to the train station, and from there we got on. We were heading back to the city; the vacation was coming to an end.

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8:50pm: Train ride back to the City.

We got back into the city at 10:30 at night, and from there we took the subway back into Brooklyn where Obie had called me an Uber to take me home. The Uber came, he kissed me goodbye, and the rest is history. I got home roughly around 11:30, and I was literally so tired that I ate some dinner and knocked out.

Reliving the weekend through this post is really making me think just how much fun I had this weekend. It wasn’t anything extreme, but I literally felt like I came back to the city as a brand new person. It almost felt like a cleanse; all the negative energy I had in me due to my surroundings and situations just washed off of me when I was in Poughkeepsie. I think I’ll always remember this weekend as one of the greater days I had in a really long time, and I hope from here Obie and I go on more trips together. We talked about going back to Poughkeepsie one day and do the things we didn’t get to do; one of them is to walk on the “Walking Across the Hudson” bridge. This weekend made me realize just how much I want to use my summers as a way to go on road trips and travel all over, and honestly, the only person I’d want to come with me is Obie. I want to see the world together with him. Cheesy, but so honest and true.

And that’s how my weekend in Poughkeepsie went.

 

-Liz (:

Mantra Mondays

Mantra Monday #3 (7/17/17)

liz

One day or day one; you decide.

Never let the fear of the future scare you. Many of us believe that we have all the time in the world to do what we want and do it whenever we have the courage to do so, but why wait to do something when you’re thinking about it now? If you want to start working out and go to the gym, start today. If you want to sign up for a music class, start today. If you want to go and get your permit or driver’s license, start today. The “one day” isn’t guaranteed, but “day one” is.

In other words, live in the present, so do things in the present.

 

-Liz (:

Mantra Mondays

Mantra Monday #2 (7/10/17)

liz

Grow through what you go through.

A person’s biggest mistake when going through a difficult time in their life is not learning from it the moment that it happens. Many of us wait until it completely passes us and when we have the time to reflect on it from a clear standpoint. Going through a rough time can result in making some dumb decisions – I’ve definitely made them myself – but not taking responsibility for your actions right then and there is not going to prevent you from making the same mistake twice. Now, there’s a difference between taking responsibility for your actions and there being a person being the cause of these actions. Taking responsibility for your actions means that every decision you decided to make was from you, not because someone forced you to do so. Yeah, there may be a person who influenced you to act a certain way, but they personally did not make you do anything; that’s all on you. That’s where a lot of people fail. It’s rare that people take responsibility for their actions in the situation, and put the blame on other people. In order to grow, you have to accept your own wrong-doings the moment you do them. iN other words, you have to be honest with yourself enough to acknowledge the decision you made wasn’t for the best. That’s how you go through your situations efficiently.

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-Liz (:

Creative Pieces

Scene: The Redemption of Life.

liz

The orange sky is coated with pink cotton candy looking clouds; the sun is setting for the day in a rural North Carolina town. A WOMAN, fit for her 40’s, is sitting on a wooden chair on the porch of her house, looking out into the open field. 

Moments later, a car slowly drives up the road to then stop in front of the woman’s house. JENNIFER, mid-20’s, tall, curly red hair, gets out of the driver’s seat carrying a tote bag full of clothing. She slams the door shut and begins walking towards the house. The woman, CLEMENTINE, notices her. 

Clementine: Miss Castro? What are you doing here?

Jennifer: *holds up the bag* I, um, came to drop this off.

Jennifer steps on the porch and leaves the bag in front of Clementine. She picks it up; the bag reads, “Southwick Dance Academy”

Clementine: … The season starts in two weeks; what’s this for?

Jennifer: I’m leaving the academy. Simple as that.

Jennifer looks towards the ground, trying to avoid contact with Clementine. Clementine analyzes Jennifer’s behavior.

Clementine: Well, I at least deserve a reason why, Miss Castro.

Jennifer: No reason at all. I’m just leaving.

Clementine’s not buying it. She sets the bag to the side and takes a deep breath into a sigh. She looks at Jennifer intently.

Clementine: Alright, what’s going on?

Jennifer: *plays it cool* Nothing. I just thought you needed to know first that I was dropping out of the academy.

Clementine: So, you traveled an hour and a half from your home to come at 6 o’clock in the evening to just drop off a bag of dance attire and tell me that you’re not returning to Southwick?

Jennifer attempts to keep her composure, but she starts fidgeting her foot on the ground.

Jennifer: Yep.

She quickly looks at the time on her phone.

Jennifer: I better get going though, I don’t want to travel back home in the dark. Thank you for the opportunity for being in your company, I hope you have a nice night, Mrs. Southwick.

Before Jennifer could walk out of the entryway, Clementine calls out for Jennifer.

Clementine: If you were so worried about driving in the dark, this would’ve waited until tomorrow morning.

Jennifer stops in her tracks but tries to redeem herself by pretending she didn’t hear Clementine. 

Clementine: *shouts a little louder* But I figured you’d wanted to be out of the town by tomorrow morning since tomorrow would’ve been your wedding day.

This makes Jennifer stop and turn around. The pain was visible on her face.

Clementine: You did send me an invitation a couple of months ago.

Jennifer walks back to Clementine, attempting to hide her pain. She looks at Clementine with a stern, straight mouth; too afraid to open it up due to the uncertainty of word-vomit that may come out.

Jennifer: *disoriented* You have no right bringing up my personal life like that, Mrs. Southwick. I am simply just one of your dance students and you are simply just my dance teacher. What happens with me in my personal life is none of your business.

Before Jennifer turns back around towards her car, Clementine stands up from her chair.

Clementine: Jennifer, I know you’re leaving town. It’s exactly what I did when my husband passed away.

Jennifer: *turns around; flabbergasted* What?

Clementine: You can’t stand walking around through the same halls and doors and rooms that your husband went through. You even sometimes think he’s walking around in there still because the floor creeks and cracks on the spots he walked on the most.

Jennifer slowly walks back to Clementine, astonished.

Clementine: You don’t sleep well at night because you can feel the less weight that is now on your bed. You cry, sometimes, because you’re alone and all you want is for them to hug you and tell you that everything’s going to be okay.

Jennifer’s body language is open. Acceptive. Hurt.

Clementine: Not only do you feel alone in the house, but you feel lost in a city that is not yours. Without him, you feel like you don’t belong anymore in a place you once called home.

Jennifer: *soft* How do you know that?

Clementine: My first husband passed away when I was twenty-five.

Clementine sits back down on the wooden chair. She looks over at the vacant seat next to her. Jennifer takes a seat.

Clementine: I married my first husband when I was 22. Straight out of college. We met at BU in Boston. He was a native, and I lived on campus. He was studying web design and I studied dance. We fell in love and by graduation, he proposed to me.

Jennifer: *reminiscing* Cullen proposed to me on New Year’s Eve.

Clementine smiles at Jennifer, then takes a deep breath.

Clementine: I thought for sure he was my soulmate. We had plans. By 28, we wanted to have a baby. By 30 we wanted to live in a house. By 35, we wanted to have at least three kids, steady jobs and had traveled the world. We had our whole life planned. *sigh* Until one night he went out to the bar with a couple of his friends from college. They were all celebrating a friend’s high-end job hiring at Google. Son of a bitch was too stubborn and drove himself home. Got into a car accident 10 minutes away from our loft. At least he didn’t suffer when he died.

Jennifer: I’m… sorry to hear that.

Clementine: *pauses to regather thoughts* My whole life came crashing down. I went on a downward spiral. I had no one to comfort me in Boston, I barely had any money, I just felt completely lost. For years I was broken. I pushed everyone away, I began partying and getting wasted every weekend; I was on the verge of being close to bones. But I look back at it now and realize that it happened for a reason. Sad to say this but if my husband didn’t pass away, I wouldn’t have found the love of my life.

Jennifer: Richard is in love with you, Clem. Anyone can see it in his eyes.

Clementine: I’ve known Rich for almost my entire life. He was my best friend. We were close until I decided to go away for college while he stayed here in North Carolina. We weren’t as close during our college years, but I realized that he was the only one there who dealt with me even after I pushed everyone away. He was the reason I moved back to North Carolina. I realized all I needed was him, which was home.

Jennifer begins to think about her scenario and her own life decisions up until this point.

Jennifer: I don’t think I could go back to New York though. I don’t know if I want to go back. I just know I can’t stay here. *eyes get watery* It hurts too much to stay.

Clementine: It took me 5 years to move back here. If there’s one thing I regret the most, is waiting too long to come back here. Because of the pain, I didn’t get to do any of the things I planned on doing with my life. Never had a kid, never had a family, and I never traveled the world.

Clementine looks at Jennifer softly, yet with guidance.

Clementine: Go out there and explore the world. Go on and find yourself. North Carolina isn’t where you belong. This is not your home. Travel the world and find the things in life that matter. Go discover yourself as a young woman. Have fun, leave your heart open. Don’t wait 10 years to achieve your life dreams like I did. Once you get a good grip on who you are, make sure you return back home. Where you belong. If I didn’t go back home, I wouldn’t have found Rich again.

Jennifer: What if there’s nothing back home for me?

Clementine: There always is, even when you’re not expecting it.

Jennifer looks out to the sky, which has turned into a violet blue; the sun is just about finished setting.

Clementine: Whenever you’re ready to go back to New York, the feeling will be indescribable. Besides marrying Rich, returning back to my roots was the second best decision I ever made in my life. If you’re anything like me, I know the same will be for you. But you have to be ready. As for now, go find yourself and your purpose in this life. Dance for other companies and academies. Reach to go build your own dancing empire. You’re so young, Jennifer. Don’t waste it on what could’ve been.

Jennifer looks around the rural area for one last time before she begins to get up from her seat. Clementine gets up with her.

Jennifer: I should get going. It’s getting dark.

As Jennifer begins to walk down the front steps, Clementine shouts.

Clementine: Jennifer!

Jennifer: *turns around* Yeah?

Clementine walks down the steps and opens her arms wide and gives Jennifer a hug. Jennifer accepts it and give one right back.

Clementine: It was an absolute pleasure to teach you this past year and a half.

Jennifer closes her eyes, opens them, and sees past Clementine’s shoulder. She sees North Carolina. She sees her late fiancee, Cullen. She sees what could’ve been. She sees the end of a chapter. She sees goodbyes.

Clementine: *lets go* You are an extraordinary and talented young woman, Jennifer. I know you’ll do what’s right.

Jennifer: Thank you, Clem.

Jennifer begins to walk back to her car. She opens the door and enters through the driver’s side. She sits there and closes her eyes for a moment. She remembers the proposal at New Year’s Eve. She remembers announcing the engagement to her family and friends. She remembers moving out to live with Cullen. She remembers moving to North Carolina. The wedding planning, the fights, the long nights in the hospital; the last night she spent with Cullen before he was gone. She looks over at Clementine, who is standing on the porch, looking at Jennifer. Clementine waves goodbye. Jennifer waves back, and starts the car. The car drives off into the road until it cannot be seen anymore.

Mantra Mondays

Mantra Monday #1 (7/3/17)

liz

Your vibe attracts your tribe.

The energy you put out into the world reflects on the type of people you have around you. If you’re naturally a pessimistic person who has a negative perspective on everything, you will “attract” people who view life the same way. Being positive, honest, and real with yourself allows others who are like that attract to you. All in all, living your life as honest and true to yourself as possible is the only way you are going to have healthy, communitive relationships and friendships.

 

-Liz (:

Self-Reflection

Metanoia: Why I’ve Been Gone.

liz

Hey, guys. After a long hiatus, welcome back to TNTH.

I’ve spent these last few weeks trying to write this post and having it reflect on the process I’ve been going through as I’ve been going through it, and every time I’ve tried explaining myself, it still doesn’t fully explain why. So excuse me if this sounds confusing, or cheesy, or down-right crazy. I promised myself that TNTH is a safe place of honesty and self-expression, so here I am doing just that.

I left for many reasons. I’ve written the list over and over again and I’ve finally come to terms with those reasons. Those reasons, or causes perhaps, made me live a lie for the last 5 months, I’ve been indulging in this life that was not my own, and eventually, I started to break down. Physically. Mentally. Emotionally.

Long story short, the pressure builds up inside of you and everything that you held back for months on end began to pour out. My honest, raw, and purest-self showed and when I look back at it, I remember how vulnerable I truly was. How desperate I wanted everything to end; the self-hate thoughts that circled through my head would not leave me alone. I realized things needed to desperately change before I was back to where I was years ago when the pain caused me to then become suicidal. I needed to find myself again.

During my time away from the world, I’ve listened to a lot of music. Specifically, I listened to Camila Cabello’s “I Have Questions” on repeat. It was the type of song that took you to a place you never knew existed in you. Every time that song plays on my phone, I feel like I fall down this trap door of every issue, problem, and insecurity of mine and I’m forced to come in contact with them all. Long story short, the song comes from her forthcoming debut album, The Hurting. The Healing. The Loving. She shares that the album is a “journey from darkness to light; [how she lost herself and then found herself again through three stages: the hurting, the healing, and the loving.]”

I’ve taken these three stages of self-discovery and applied it to my own life. It’s when I realized that I have the power to fix what I want to fix, find what I want to find, change what I want to change, and to simply heal the hurt so that I can love again.

This is who I was, who I am, and what I’m working to become.

Continue reading “Metanoia: Why I’ve Been Gone.” →

Self-Appreciation Saturdays

SAS: The Best Advice for the Planners in Life. (5/20/17)

liz

I am a planner.

I feel the most organized when I have things thoroughly planned out in detail for every day of the week. It’s why my dry-erase board calendar is usually full during the month, I currently have a TNTH Schedule for future posts, I just started bullet journaling, and I had two detailed outlines on index cards for my final research papers taped alongside my desk for the last month and a half.

Obsessive? Yeah, but in some odd way, it calms my worries about the short-term things that need to get done.

The long-term goals? Planning those things can actually create the worries you don’t want. I know for me, planning long-term goals are scary because things happen. Things change, interests change. For years, I dedicated my time to get myself more into the cinema scene; I took screenwriting classes to learn my craft and planned the next three years to study screenwriting and film in a graduate school specifically made for cinema. For once, I had long-term plans that I was working towards. But then life happened. I was rejected from the film school and I felt lost with my plans again.

Although I am in grad school getting my Master’s degree anyway, it still feels weird to not know what I want to do after I graduate. I start my second year in the Fall, yet I don’t have any plans after I finish. All of the people I encounter in grad school have plans of being teachers and such, but I know I was not meant for that type of job. I like English for the writing, not for the literature, and teaching English is dealing with the literature. If I can’t do cinema, I would want to do something solely dealing with writing.

The group of people I know and follow on social media tends to be people who are already in grad school, are graduating college in the next couple of weeks, or going into their last year of college in the Fall. One of the things we all have in common at these different levels in our education is that we all either have a distinct goal in mind after college, or we have absolutely no idea what we want to do. Until we all feel like we’re getting somewhere in life, those long-term plans for life are going to be at the back of our minds and make us worry.

And if you’re a planner like me, these worries turn into bad anxiety.

A couple of weeks ago, I was going through a major anxiety attack about everything in life. Literally, everything felt like it was crashing down. I spoke to my mother to talk the worries out and possibly get some advice to help me out. My mother and I have most of the same personality traits, and I needed to speak to someone before I considered talking to a professional. She asked me what were the things I was getting anxiety over, and as I was telling her, they all seemed to be about my long term plans.

As my mother was giving me advice, she told me to “live in the present.”

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Many of us forget that the most precious thing we have in the world is time. We are never granted another day or another year, and I learned that after my Uncle passed away unexpectedly earlier this year. We also tend to worry and stress out about the future so much that we never see the beautiful and wonderful things happening now. I remember my undergrad years as being a time where time just flew by. I was going by each day with the objective in mind of graduating on time that I never really enjoyed my college life. It wasn’t until my senior year of college where I actually started to enjoy my school life and just life in general. Although it’s great to try to have your life all figured out and focused in, it’s good to also enjoy the things around you. Enjoy your family, your friends, the weather, your interests, and hobbies. Also if you have a ton of work that you need to do in the present, get it done so that you can move on to the next thing you have to do. Sometimes, the constant work makes anyone feel robotic. The reality is that whether you like it or hate it, it needs to be done.

All in all, it seems like “living in the present” is a statement that appears to be obvious and cliche, but many of us just forget to do it because as a generation of people in our 20’s, we always tend to focus on the future. Take a step back every once and awhile to enjoy the little things in life.

-Liz (:

Self-Appreciation Saturdays

Self-Appreciation Saturday. (5/13/17)

liz

It’s been a rough couple of weeks due to the stress and anxiety of the semester coming to an end and I’ve been trying my best to keep my mind happy. In an attempt to be okay and calm, I came up with a list of things to do when you’re feeling down or anxious about life:

  1. Try to wake up early. Sleeping too late makes you feel like you wasted a good day. Make sure to wake up in the morning and get things done!
  2. Go for a walk. Put on your walking shoes and take a nice walk around your neighborhood. You never know where your feet might take you and see what new things you discover.
  3. Seek change if necessary. Maybe there’s something you want to need to change in order to start anew. Cut your hair, revamp your wardrobe, pick up a new hobby!
  4. No drinking or smoking for awhile. I realized during my time of anxiety, I was beginning to enjoy handling it with drinking and the occasional smoking and after awhile, I realized this wasn’t something I wanted to keep doing. Saying no to any substances, whether in a safe environment or a party setting, helps you gain back some control you weren’t having.
  5. Keep a journal. Keeping track of the things you’re feeling or going through on a day-to-day basis helps you not keep those things bottled up for an extended period of time.
  6. Eat/drink healthier foods. Personally, I feel better whenever I’m eating something good for me like fruits and vegetables and definitely when I’m drinking smoothies during a warm day. Knowing that I’m putting good things into my body helps me think of positive things.
  7. Have a support system. Having people in your circle who genuinely care about your well-being makes the bad feelings go away because sometimes, all you need to do is have someone who matters listen to you. Sometimes in cases with anxiety, people who have it feel worried that when expressing their anxiety to other people feel as if they are annoying them. Just having one or two people sit down with you to talk about it will help you out.
  8. Never leave school work to the last minute. With two 15-page papers being in the process of being finalized and handed in, it’s not ideal to leave them for the last minute. Make time for yourself to finish all your work so that you can finally start your little break away from school.
  9. Laugh often. Laughter is truly the best medicine; don’t deprive yourself of it.
  10. Do what makes you happy. Read a book, draw, exercise, sing, write; whatever puts your spirit in a good place, do it.
  11. Stop waiting for life to happen. Make sure you are doing something every single day that it’s helping you move forward so that the “waiting” doesn’t feel like waiting at all.
  12. Be kind to yourself. Remember, you are not perfect, no matter how badly your mind wants you to be. You are only human, and humans are definitely not capable of perfection, so stop trying to explain to yourself why you feel a certain way or why you’re behaving out. Accept that you are going through a rough time, but never let it take over your life.

if they can do it, you can do it. remember that. focus, determination, passion. invincible.:

-Liz (: