Hey, guys – welcome back to TNTH!

With the college school year coming in a couple of weeks, it feels immensely weird not getting ready to go back and start a brand new school year at my college. For the last 6 years, I’ve been returning to my college and two degrees later, it’s now my time to say good-bye being a student, which is frightening.

Over the summer, I gave myself the well-needed break that I was yearning for back when I was wrapping up grad school, and I did, but now that the summer season is almost over and people start returning back to their lives within the next month, it was about time I got myself together and start making moves looking forward.

Although I told myself I was going to let myself take a break, I knew it wasn’t going to last long. I found myself looking for jobs as early as the middle of June, and since then I’ve been applying to different types of jobs left and right.

One thing the majority of the people have a misconception of (even actual grad students pursuing their master’s degrees) is that you’re automatically going to get hired to any job you apply for because you have a master’s degree. While it heightens your chances because it makes you “stand out”, the reality of applying for jobs while having a master’s degree is pretty much the same as having a regular degree: it’s pretty much the same. 

Being a person who’s never had a real job before yet has the education credentials needed is literally a blessing and a curse. That “must need a bachelor’s/masters degree” requirement is never an issue for me, but that “and [blank] years of experience” is what pretty much either makes or breaks the deal. I chose to focus on my studies than get a job while getting my degrees, but it sometimes feels like a lost opportunity that I didn’t take advantage of at the time. So, finding jobs is even harder if you don’t have the work experience: while you need that shitty job to get work experience, your degree makes you over-qualified for the job, and most of the time, companies will let you go or not even consider you because they don’t want to pay you the money you actually deserve.

Also, the reality of the job hunting process is exactly what it is: a process. You’re not going to get hired at the first job you apply for, you’re not going to get an immediate interview once you send out your resume, and you’re most likely going to get rejected even if you make it as far as the interview stages of your process. Having a master’s degree doesn’t save you or make the process easier for you, it only does that in the long run, years after you got that damn degree.

Having a master’s degree is an accomplishment that I still sometimes forget to celebrate and acknowledge. You work extremely hard to get that piece of paper, so you best to believe that whatever jobs you’re looking for, they recognize hard work when they see it. But, that not always the scenario and in reality, more people are getting master’s degrees than ever. Millions of other people are on the same page as you. That, honestly, shouldn’t even matter and it shouldn’t discourage you. Take every opportunity for what it is, and take every experience as a learning lesson. You’re not going to be unemployed for the rest of your lives, not unless you allow yourself to give up. Yeah, I’m still searching and hope that my process progresses sooner rather than later, but I know when that one job hits, it will land, not because I have my master’s, but because I’m hard-working and driven.

As my partner’s been telling me: you gotta get your feet wet!

-Liz. (:

Hey guys, welcome back to TNTH!

A couple of weeks ago, I read some old TNTH posts and came across one that I wrote last year entitled “First Tattoo: Story + Meaning”. I was very fortunate to get a first tattoo that I really cared about and never had second doubts getting it. The story behind it was one that I wanted to explain because “home was us” wasn’t a common phrase like “stay strong”. In other words, I had (and still have to) explain to everyone what the story behind the tattoo is.

Since then, I’ve got another tattoo (only took me three years to do) and the story and meaning behind this one are much more simple than the first:

On October 6th, 2017 around 12:30ish, I got my second tattoo.

Even before my first tattoo, I wanted something that would be in a typewriter font for as long as I could remember. To me, they looked clean and carried such a writer’s aura that I know I wanted to have whatever word that I was going to get. Coming to a word was hard; I wanted to get a word that meant more than just one thing. I wanted something that represented who I was as a 23-year-old grad student growing up. I played with many different words that I thought was the one, and when I got to “write“, I didn’t hesitate to choose that word.

Despite common belief, I didn’t get the tattoo to symbolize that I am a writer. I got it because of where I was (and currently am) in my life. During my first year of grad school, I began to feel this division between those in the program who were “readers” and those who were “writers”. My MA program was predominantly a literature program and I felt like I was in a place where I felt misunderstood and constantly put down because I wasn’t like the majority of the students in the program. One class I had my first semester in grad school taught me a lot about writing and the writing universe I never knew about because of literature is the one that is always deemed “more important”. For the past two years, I worked on my thesis with the professor who taught that same class, and as of now, my thesis is completed, passed, and archived at my college’s library. That thesis even allowed me to speak at my college’s graduate conference in early May about the same division within student writers in college classrooms, and for once I felt proud and just as important being a writer. It’s a label I don’t think I’ll ever scratch off, no matter what type of job I get and where life takes me. I write because it is my way of speaking.

I got this tattoo to remind myself that all I gotta do is write whenever I am feeling or thinking something that I cannot put into words properly. I’m not the best speaker; I’ve dealt with a speech impediment for most of my life and it’s sometimes hard to express good ideas verbally. I feel like ever since I started to use writing as a form of expressing myself, I was able to reach out to an audience much more efficiently than just speaking to them. A lot of the ideas I had for school papers of creative pieces would be so intricate that explaining them out loud didn’t give them the justice it deserved. I use writing as my form of expression, and I take it very seriously because it has not only gave me a platform to express myself but it in a way saved me from myself. It saved me from being in my head on restless nights. It saved me from making extreme decisions out of pure emotion I was feeling at that moment. It saved me from saying and doing a lot of things to myself. It gave me a reason to live, in all honesty.

So yeah, I wish the meaning of my second tattoo was just as interesting as the first one, but this experience was a lot less nerve-wracking than the first! This time, I went to get this tattoo alone on a Friday, autumn afternoon (one in which felt like it was still the middle of the summer) and went to the same tattoo artist who did my first one (which btw if you’re in the Bay Ridge area, I highly recommend Matt at Brooklyn Ink!) It took him a while to get his station set up because I was one of the first people to even enter the shop that day so in the meantime, we spoke about random things like college, the commute to CSI, how that bus is forever crowded (the bus stop is down the block from the tattoo shop) and the reality of people wanting word tattoos to face them so they can personally read them, which I find hilarious. I mean, a tattoo is a piece of art on your body, show it to the world! Anyway…

I had also asked my tattoo artist if it was alright if he touched up my first tattoo. Like I said in my first tattoo story, I was 20 and wasn’t really careful with my tattoo during the healing process, so it was extremely patching for three years. He kindly touched it up, and had asked me the actual meaning of my first tattoo. When I told him, the other guy in the shop at the time chimed in and said, “You’re a fan of The Killing? Bro, how great of a show was that shit?” 

When I say I thought I was the only other person in the world to like The Killing… it was amazing to find two other fans of the show! It was honestly the second time someone had asked me what the tattoo meant and actually knew what the hell I was talking about. After the touch-up, both of my tattoos were now wrapped up, and I left to go home. I was really happy to have a second tattoo on my body; I honestly thought I was only going to have the one for the rest of my life…

… but let’s face it, getting a tattoo is addicting, so see you guys for the potential third story in the future. 😉

-Liz. (:

Hey, guys – welcome back to TNTH!

I know it’s been a hot minute since you’ve seen some new music on the blog (and trust me, the music has definitely changed since the last one), so instead of just picking a few, I’ll show my entire playlist of things I’m bumping to!

I hope you guys find some gems to add to your playlist, and enjoy them this weekend! See you guys tomorrow!

-Liz. (:

Hey, guys – welcome back to TNTH.

A couple of weeks ago, the internet found out that on July 23rd, Demi Lovato was rushed to the hospital after being found unconscious in her home due to an apparent overdose. While sites believed it was due to heroin, sources close to Lovato claim that it wasn’t heroin, but quite possibly a mix of opioids and meth.

Prior to this incident, Demi Lovato released a song only a month before, entitled “Sober“, which she admits that she relapsed after six years of her sobriety. Many of her fans were shocked, supportive, and yes, even disappointed that she would go back to living a life that she advocated against, but many people concluded the song to be an apology and the start of getting herself clean once again. So when the news broke out about her overdose in late July, many were shocked, even scared that Demi would be the next Lil Peep. Whitney Houston. Amy Winehouse, especially since July 23rd would’ve made 7 years since Winehouse’s death at 27.

On August 6th, Demi released a post on Instagram stating the following:

https://www.instagram.com/p/BmHH69KlY3L/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=embed_loading_state_control 

Anyone who follows Demi and her journey. or personally knows someone dealing with addiction knows what Demi said is true: addiction doesn’t just disappear or fade with time. It’s a constant battle you have to fight with. You don’t have to be addicted to drugs or alcohol for it to be considered an addiction. People could be addicted to food, sex, people, pretty much anything, and overcoming any addiction on the spectrum is extremely difficult and it never goes away. You find yourself trying to control the way you eat, but find yourself just eating everything one night? You find yourself promising your significant other you won’t cheat on them, but then sleep with a random girl you found at the club that night? You find yourself completely hanging out with the wrong crowd, yet always go back to them because of the memories and connections you had? These things are all forms of relapsing, and we can’t expect people who deal with drug and alcohol addictions to just get clean and stay off of it for the rest of their lives; it’s merely impossible and very unrealistic to expect that from them.

I personally deal with family who have addictions of their own and who either fight them to be healthier or ignore them whenever they please. Seeing it around me, I know how it feels to be sick and tired of seeing those with addictions continuously going about their days doing the things that are hurting them. You ask yourself how hard could it be to just stop doing it. You get mad that those people can’t stop their addictions. You ultimately give up on those people when they “disappoint” you time and time again. While I’m not excusing addicts for their behavior, I’m simply saying that if you try to overpower your addiction and fail to do so time and time again, that doesn’t mean you failed as a person. It means you’re a fucking human being. If you relapse, don’t sulk in your failures of staying clean and healthy. Keep fighting your battles, keep talking about your battles, and have supportive people around you who are willing to support your battles.

What happened to Demi Lovato was a tragedy; fans of her could’ve easily lost the person that got many of them to take care of their mental health and possible addictions. The music industry would’ve lost a powerhouse voice, that’s for sure. Many of our great singers and actors lost their lives due to their addictions; it just comes to show that these things can happen to anyone, no matter what status you may be on. One thing is for certain: we have to keep talking about these sorts of things in our everyday lives. We can’t wait to see the next celebrity on the front page of every website in order for us to start talking about the importance again. No matter what day it is, talk about these things and help people realize that they aren’t alone and that there is help out there!

*If you or anyone you know has a drug/substance abuse problem, please seek up at the 24/7 National Drug Hotline on their website. People are more than willing to help you out get the help that you may need.

-Liz. (:

Hey, guys – welcome back to TNTH.

Since I’m a huge fan of YouTube and their creators, I’ve also recognized that there are creators on their platform that are very problematic. *cough-LoganPaul-cough* 

The thing about being a YouTube creator is that nine out of the ten times you’re uploading, you’re going to have some influence on the audience that you target. For example: if you’re a gamer that focuses on Five Nights at Freddy’s gameplay, lore, and updates on its creator, you are most likely going to target a younger audience of kids who are into the game. If you’re a beauty guru that vlogs all these cool and hip events in Downtown L.A, you’re most likely are targeting young women (and men) who are into beauty and makeup and all that jazz. Of course, your audience isn’t defined in that one circle of viewers, but the way you’re going to get new viewers is targeting to the things they like. If the majority of your audience finds you being their go-to YouTuber to review makeup palettes, you’re catering to that specific audience.

I say this because I truly believe some creators go on YouTube without realizing they’re pretty much selling their souls to the internet. You could be the most authentic person in your videos, but your viewers could have a hard time connecting with you, which they will easily conclude you as “being fake”.

I say this with one YouTuber in mind: Simply Kenna. Personally, I don’t support her so if you want to go and watch her videos after reading this, you could find her yourself. “Simply Kenna”, or McKenna, is a YouTuber who first got noticed because of her “aesthetically pleasing” looking Instagram page. It seemed like at first, people really enjoyed her content, and her subscriber count began to grow. People were able to connect with her until she started to get really comfortable on YouTube and started to share things that offended viewers and targeted audiences. Again, there’s a whole lot of videos that can catch you up on every problematic thing she’s done and said, so I advise you just find one and watch it.

What I want to talk about is McKenna during the last couple of months. Because most of her income comes from being an online presence, she has to keep her followers entertained. Every season, this girl changes her look, and her aesthetic. In the last year, McKenna has been very vocal about her interests in anime, which then expanded into BTS, which then expanded into everything about the East Asian culture. She’s traveled to Japan twice thus far, and since her travels, her interests in the Japanese culture have become more than just interests. It’s gotten to a point where she purposely tries to make herself appear East Asian through various photo apps, which people have started to call her out on.

Before.

After.

People began to categorize her “appreciation of Japanese culture” as her “fetishizing” it. She has tried countless times again to use her “aro/ace” sexuality to defend how she can’t possibly fetishize Japan and its culture because she can’t feel sexual desires towards anything.

Girl, come on now.

I bring this up simply because this girl has a large following. She is an influencer. She chose to have this type of life and the message she is putting out there is a very problematic one. There is nothing wrong liking other things from another culture; many Americans are now starting to enjoy listening to K-Pop music (because of BTS, obviously) as a genre of music. Many people like to watch anime and the Japanese culture. But once you start enjoying something that isn’t a part of your own culture, it is only right to do some research behind it. I started to listen to K-Pop music (mainly girl groups) because the music was catchy and these girls are crazy talented. Because I like listening to them and watching them on South Korean variety shows, I also had to learn that K-Pop groups are only widely successful because they hold their groups on extremely strict rules and have them on extremely tight schedules. It’s honestly something that these young girls signed their lives away to, and the conditions these groups have to sometimes work in are extremely harsh. But, that’s honestly just a part of their culture that we, as Westerners, don’t always see.

People who appreciate a culture know that what they like isn’t the overall image. No, Black Culture isn’t just Drake and Cardi B, it’s years of violence and oppression that Black Americans are still going through. Japanese culture isn’t just Tokyo and “Kawaii” things, it’s a history of depression and high rates of suicide due to mental health being widely unacceptable and demeaning. Also, appreciating a culture also means that you, as a person that is not of that specific culture, are not trying to become a member of that said culture. No cornrows, head wraps, or blackface to fit in that culture.

McKenna is trying to convince to her following that what she is doing to the Japanese culture isn’t harmful or demeaning in any way, and what she’s doing is “appreciating” it. That’s extremely dangerous in a world where there are people who get murdered, stereotyped, and degraded for looking a certain way and being who they are. Yet we have white people calling it “fashion” or “appreciation”.

Honestly, if you feel the need to become completely immersed in a culture where you have to sit down and edit a photo of yourself to look like another race is beyond fetishizing. It’s mockery. You are showing insecure and naive followers who haven’t yet discovered themselves looking at that pretty edited picture wanting to look and be like that. That’s the sad thing about this all: she is not just some random girl from the street who culture appropriates on her own time. She’s not just making herself look like a fool. She is putting thousands of other girls and guys in danger because they see their influencer being able to look a certain way without any acknowledgment on her part that what she’s doing is wrong.

At the end of the day, use your platform to inform and express things that we, as an audience, can do to make a change in what’s going on. Hey, instead of just broadcasting a whole new makeup line and tell your audience to go out and buy it, tell them some information about the product that will be useful for them. What skin complexions/textures does it work for? Is there a cheaper dupe out there if the product is too expensive to purchase for viewers on a budget? Your viewers want to still be able to connect with you even after you “made it big”. Yeah, you worked your ass off to get where you’re at, and flaunt your shit, but stay true to yourself and your authenticity.

Then, it wouldn’t be so hard to be yourself.

-Liz. (: