Black Sheep in Society.

Emergency Room Black Sheep: A Monologue.

I can’t keep my legs from fidgeting. They keep bouncing in place as I sit in the waiting room of the hospital, looking around for any sign of a doctor that is taking care of Rosie. I had no choice but to let my parents take control of what was happening. What the fuck was I suppose to tell them? My mother looked at me and at Rosie and instantly turned white in the face. My father told my sisters to go to their room before he told my mom to start the car. He tells me to take a robe from the bathroom and put on Rosie. I gave her mine. He carried Rosie down the stairs and into the car, and I followed behind. My mom called Dylan’s cellphone, telling her and Reagan to stay in the house and that we should be home in a couple of hours. I sat in the backseat with Rosie, holding her with a blanket over her to keep her warm.

My mind comes back to the present when my mom walks over to me. I look up at her, hoping the doctor at least told her something.

“Is she okay?!” I asked. My mom sighed. She didn’t answer my question.

“What the hell happened, Micah?” she asked me, concerned.

“I don’t know! She came over looking like that and I was trying to help,” I tried to explain, but my mom wasn’t hearing me. She just wanted answers. I wanted them too. “Ma, is Rosie okay?”

“Do you know her parents? They need to be here,” she asked. I didn’t know what to say; I was so confused about everything that was happening already.

“She’s not from New York, she lives by herself, I– is she okay?!” I was annoyed that my mom wouldn’t answer my question. She looked at me, annoyed.

“Did she look okay hunched over in our living room half-naked, Micah?” she blurted out.

“Well, we are in a hospital, Ma, the one fucking place she should be okay in!” I yelled out. My dad walked toward us, trying to keep the peace between my mom and me. We always didn’t see eye-to-eye much. My dad says it’s because my mom and I think so much alike, our personalities just tend to clash. I just think my mom is overprotective and very stubborn at times.

“Hey, hey! Let’s not make this about us now,” my dad scolded. My mom gets up from her seat, stressed and nearly in tears.

“That girl came over time and time again to help Micah with his work and to see her the way she is now, I just…” She starts to cry. My dad tries to calm her down by giving her a hug and rubbing small circles on her back. Rosie needed someone to protect her, and I couldn’t even do that. I get up from my seat, frustrated and angry. My dad watches me walk away.

I walk out the front of the hospital and go inside my pockets, hoping I had a loosie in there. Of course, I fucking don’t. I spiral in place, not knowing what to do or think.

“Fuck!” I yelled at the top of my lungs. I didn’t care who heard me. I wanted nothing more than to beat the shit out of the one person I know who would do this to her. It was obvious that it was him. I’ve had this hunch for weeks and I hate myself for not saying something about it sooner. Now, she’s in a fucking hospital; traumatized and so fucking broken. I fear that Rosie won’t come back from this, and that’s what makes me want to bash this motherfucker’s face on the sidewalk.

He didn’t deserve her. Rosie deserves the fucking world and he’s nothing but scum. I suddenly become sad. Yeah, and she doesn’t deserve you either, Micah. You didn’t even see that she was hurting. Before I allowed myself to spiral, my dad calls out my name. I turn around to see him walking toward me.

“Hey, bud,” he greets me. He puts a hand on my shoulder and squeezes it. “You know how your mother gets. She’s just worried about you.”

“I know,” I quickly answered. “I hope she doesn’t think I did that to Rosie,” I admitted. I didn’t think my mom would think I would harm a girl like that, but there’s literally no other explanation besides the truth.

“She doesn’t think that,” my dad reassured. “She’s just concerned for your and her’s safety.” I don’t say anything back. At this point, I just want to know if she’s okay.

A nurse came out from the doors that led to the hospital rooms in the back, but none to ever come out and speak to us about Rosie. I was getting mad at this point; we’ve been here for hours and we couldn’t get answers or any updates on Rosie.

“Yo, what the fuck is up with Rosie Delgado?” I yelled out, surprising my parents.

“Micah,” my mom whispered at me. I wasn’t hearing it.

“No! We’ve been here for hours and we haven’t gotten a single word about her, like what kind of fucking hospital are you running here?” I get up and work to the receptionist. My parents try to pull me back toward my seat as I tried to resist.

“Micah, calm down!” my mom warned me. I couldn’t help it anymore. I just needed to know if my fucking best friend was severely injured or not.

It wasn’t until I saw a man come in, racing towards the receptionist desk.

“I’m Detective Sam Hudson, Philadelphia Police Department,” the man said. I looked at him, scrunching my eyebrows as he spoke. Philadelphia? As in the city Rosie is from? “I’m here to see Rosie Delgado.”

What the fuck is the police department in Philly doing here? Fuck, is it that serious that the police from her hometown have to get involved? I couldn’t help but eavesdrop; I was already sitting so close to the desk and I needed to know more.

“And what is your relationship to her?” The receptionist asked.

“I’m her guardian,” the man answered. What? The recpetionist lead the man towards the back door towards the hospital rooms. Nothing was making sense to me at that point. I really did not know Rosie the way I thought I did. Maybe she really is a person that I don’t know anything about. Maybe there was a reason this happened to her tonight. Maybe I’m defending someone who really is the bad guy in all of this. I rolled my eyes, frustrated at what was happening.

At this time, my mom got off the phone and sighed. She grabs her bag and gets up from her seat.

“I’m going to the bathroom; I’ll meet you guys out in the car,” she said to my dad as she left the waiting room.

“Wait, what? We’re leaving?! We can’t leave Rosie here!” I argued with my dad. He tried to calm me down before we were going to be escorted out my security.

“There’s nothing more we can do, Micah,” he began. “Her legal guardian is here and he will take care of her.”

“What the fuck! I need to know if she’s okay!” I wasn’t leaving that fucking hospital without any answers. “I need to know what the fuck happened! She needs to tell me who did this shit to her!”

“Micah, please,” my dad was growing annoyed at my behavior, and I didn’t fucking care. “We need to go home. Now.”

Before I knew, I was trying my best to get to the back door as a ple of desperation. I just wanted to fucking know if she was okay, that she wasn’t going to fucking die in that hospital room due to her injuries, that she wasn’t in some sort of severe coma or some shit. I just fucking needed answers.

I didn’t get those answers tonight. Security was called, and I was forced out of the hospital.

We got home and I immediately stormed into my room. I slammed the door shut, frustrated and exhausted. I took a deep breath in and out. I shut my eyes and opened them up. I looked at the ground where Rosie’s dress laid. I slowly walk to it and pick it up from the ground. I couldn’t hold it in anymore. I sobbed, and couldn’t stop.

I’m so fucking sorry I failed you, Rosie.

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