Hey, guys – welcome back to TNTH.
I wasn’t on planning to come back on here anytime soon due to a lot of things that are currently happening in my life. It’s been a lot for me to handle but I realize that TNTH is just more than a platform of “views” and “followers”. It’s my place where I can write, and I’ve missed it. Plus, it’s only right to come back with this month’s installment of:
I started this series in July 2017; exactly a year ago. It started off being a post about how I described myself as being a “voiceless person”, meaning, I don’t speak out or speak up enough. At the time of the first installment, I never thought twice about continuing this series and to make it into something like this. Yeah, TNTH is just my blog, but the “Voiceless Rant” series is about me and about me being a writer.
Sometimes I forget that I’m a writer and I write to help others.
This series has evolved into a monthly post where I come in talking about something that I’m currently going through and write about it in hopes of reaching out to someone who is too. Maybe there is a reader who doesn’t know where to turn to discuss their mental health. Maybe there is a reader who’s been traumatized by their family to the point of no return. Maybe there is a reader with insecurities, doubts, and judgment holding onto them by a leash. There are so many different people out in the world that you don’t know (and I don’t know) that is looking at you and seeing inspiration and motivation. You never know who is watching your content, reading your content, or viewing your content while holding back tears of sadness, waiting to end their life.
This post sounds like it’s not going anywhere, but hear me out. I was suicidal around the time I got into the TV show, The Killing. As dark and moody that show was, I will forever say that The Killing and its online community saved my life. I was suicidal all throughout my last year of high-school. Kelly Clarkson’s My December was all that I listened to because I related to every single song on that album. It is still considered one of my favorite albums of all time, and it will always hold a special place in my heart because that album saved my life. My point being is that creators and artists don’t know these things about their fans. Veena Sud does not know her television show saved my life one night when I was up at 5 in the morning wanting to not exist anymore. Kelly Clarkson does not know that an album that almost got completely scrapped because of it not being the “image” her record label wanted her to have saved my life when I was at my loneliest in life. Creators don’t know these things, but it doesn’t mean that they don’t have the potential power and influence to save someone’s life. I see it all the time in the comments of my favorite YouTubers; that their content makes them smile and happy in the gist of sadness and depression.
Let’s be real here: I’m no famous influencer with 100,000 followers, let alone 100. I am only one person. I have an immensely small community here on TNTH that is just as enough for me because, again, I don’t know who is reading certain posts in their time of need. Maybe I am, and maybe I’m not, and the majority of these posts are types of posts I wish I was reading in my time of need years ago. Shoot, I’m writing them now because I need them just as much as the next person. My point being is that I always knew that I was supposed to write to help others find their voices. I started to write to begin to speak in a language where people would listen to me. I write to express myself, heal myself, and speak up for myself with hopes of showing other people that they can do the same thing too.
If you’re a creator of any sorts who feel like they could just stop doing what they love doing, your mind and heart were never into it. Creating content, no matter how big or small takes time, dedication, passion, and devotion. Creating was never about making it big and gaining such a huge following (because the same people who wanted that for themselves are the same people who yearn for their lives back). Make your content because you want to make it. Make your content because you’re passionate about it. Make your content because you feel like you have more to show and tell. Make your content because you want to provide something for viewers in their time of need. Keep doing it.
And this is something that I truly need to start telling myself too. I leave TNTH unattended for weeks, even months on end because of my own personal reasons. I leave because I have to personally work on something. I have to personally get better. There’s nothing wrong with taking breaks here and there, but it doesn’t mean you just give up when things get too hard. There’s no reset button on passion. You either have it, or you don’t.