Dear Summer 2023,
You came and went faster than any other summer I had within the last couple of years. It seems as if the unofficial start of the summer was yesterday and the news of the beaches opening excited all of us that patiently waited for warm weather to come. It seems like it was yesterday that I was sitting on the deck of my aunt’s backyard, sipping a glass of chardonnay while listening to 80’s Classic Rock on the Bluetooth speaker. Now it’s back to school for the kids and teenagers, back to a full work schedule for the adults, and back to the “Ber” months of the year where many people celebrate the Fall season through Halloween and other autumn related activities.
But before we get too far ahead of ourselves, let us take a moment to talk about you.
Summer 2023, you have been the first summer in a very long time where I spent most of my free time by myself. I was truly on my own to do anything socially this summer, but you also have been the first summer in a really long time that I got to do fun, outdoorsy things in a more confident way. I spent most of my days at the local community pool, sunbathing for hours and swimming during the times when the pool wasn’t so busy. I sat in the sun, thinking about the things I needed to do once I was done at the pool, but most of the time I thought about how content I’ve been since adapting new techniques and methods on living a healthier lifestyle mentally. Your summer mornings at the pool were possibly my favorite time of the day. The pool waters is calm and the sun beaming down onto the water took me back to my childhood summers when my aunt used to have a pool in her backyard in her old house. The tan lines show just how much time was spent at the pool. I am grateful that you allowed me the time and confidence to go to the pool as a solo adventure and in a one-piece bathing suit without swim shorts for the first time in 18 years. Needless to say, I hope to now keep this summer tradition for future summers to come.
Summer time meant more time spent with fur babies, especially on the days where I was having such a hard day and all I needed was a hug from one of my cats. It also meant spending time with my grandmother’s dog whenever my family and I went to visit. Last summer, I spent most of it taking care of my cats, who were then just kittens. While last summer that caused a lot of my anxiety, this summer it was refreshing to hop into bed and have the cats come and greet me after a long day at work. Summer 2023, you have shown me just how much I value the fur-babies in my life, and that they are the purest form of serotonin I have in my life.
Summer 2023, you have taught me that it is okay to move on and not hold any grudges towards the people you once knew and the versions of myself that did not last for long. I learned that the (one of many keys) to true happiness is setting boundaries with not just those around me, but with myself as well. I learned I can be just as toxic as those around me; therefore, I needed to set those boundaries with myself as well. Summer 2023, you shown me places within my own neighborhood that I haven’t visited on my own just for the fact that was too afraid to. I was able to go into cute boutiques where Ramon Cola and Japanese snacks were sold on the shelves. I was able to write blog posts sitting on top of a rock that was located on top of the hill, facing the direction closest to the water. I was able to get Korean corn dogs and Triangular kimbap after work on the days I craved it the most, even though I have yet mastered the proper way to unwrap the kimbap and have it stay in place. I was able to actually go into a store and shop for clothes in-person; something that I was not able to do when I was heavier. It was empowering to realize that I was now a size Large; a size I don’t ever remember being in a really long time. I was able to do a lot of things on my own because, well, I had to be my own friend to hang out with this time around. Of course, some days I felt lonely, but never alone. I think that mentality comes with maturing and learning that the only person that will look after you, care for you, and be there for you through it all is you.
Lastly, you have shown me that hard work truly pays off. Summer 2023, do you remember the day I was at work on a gloomy Wednesday afternoon? Something felt off mentally for me; it was like I wasn’t able to really focus on my job without getting some wave of anxiety about something. I went to the bathroom one final time before clocking out for the day, returning to my co-workers telling me that the Head of Registrar was looking for me. I had nervously went into her office to see that she was on a call with my immediate boss; the Supervisor of Historical Records. I sat in a seat next to the Head of Registrar, in which then my immediate boss said out loud: “The full-time position that’s been in the works as been approved by Central.” Do you remember me literally crying in that office, feeling like I was on top of the world? I don’t remember much after, but I remember even admitting to the two women that this week in particular was extremely difficult for me, and this has been some of the greatest news I got in a really long time. Do you remember that? You must do; it’s been the highlight of what the summer was for me. New opportunities. New beginnings. A new journey to add onto this chapter of my life. I don’t think that I’ll ever forget the feeling I had walking out of the office feeling as wanted and valued as a new professional in higher education.
This is just the beginning, and it all started during the summer of 2023.
Letters From Liz. 